One Jump Ahead to Light Speed

by Kelson Vibber

To the tune of “One Jump Ahead” from Aladdin
by Alan Mencken and Tim Rice

(Han Solo is running through a city from Imperial Stormtroopers)

Han Solo:
Gotta keep—
One jump ahead of the Empire
Long range, or just a quick jaunt,
I ship anything my clients want
Well, if they pay!
One jump ahead of the Espos
That’s all, and that’s no joke.
The Hutt don’t appreciate I’m broke.

Crowd:
Low-life! Outlaw!
Pirate! Scoundrel!

Han:
Just a load of spice, guys!
Stormtroopers:
Blast him, scrape him off the wall, guys!
Han:
I can take a hint, gotta face the facts,
Chewie, you’re my only pal!
(Chewie arrives)
Chewbacca:
Ngaaurgh!

Locals:
Han Solo’s here, the Empire wants to dust him.
He’s become a one-man rise in crime.
It’s that Wookiee, I would never trust him.
Han:
Gotta smuggle spice, Jabba wants my head,
Tell you all about it when I got the time!

One block to get to the Falcon.
One leap off-planet — I’m free.
Next time, use another fake I.D.
One jump ahead of the hitmen
One job to pay off the boss.
I think I’ll make this bantha need to floss.
(Stormtroopers slam into a bantha, which tries to eat one of them)

Stormtroopers:
Catch him! Split up!
Stop there! Hands up!
Han:
Don’t upset this Wookiee! (Chewie growls)
Might mistake you for a cookie—
Gotta make this run, Jabba wants me dead,
Otherwise we’d get along!
Stormtroopers:
Wrong!

(Makes it to Falcon)
Han: (Stormtroopers)
Preflight, ahead of the blasters (Han and Chewie in cockpit)
- - - (Outlaw!)
Blast off, escape this dump (Blast off)
- - - (Smuggler!)
One trick ahead of disaster (In orbit, running from Star Destroyer)
- - - (Scoundrel!)
They’re quick, but I’m much faster
- - - (Pirate!)
Here goes, make the jump to lightspeed,
See you in Mos Eisley,
All I gotta do is jump!

June 1994